Don We Now Our Gay Apparel

Fa la la,  la la la,  la! la! la!

This lively Welsh carol,  even though it pre-dates our family, quite accurately describes our foul-weather fashion sense. There's nothing like a day in the woods in festive hats and snow gear--most of which hasn't been updated since the 80's.  Our family seems to have a knack for putting the wonder in Winter WonderLAND.

But when we don the gear, it can only mean one thing--Time for our annual Christmas Tree Hunt. This yearly trek into the woods almost always spells t-r-o-u-b-l-e, which, come to think of it, is the main reason why we don't just buy one off the lot.  Lot trees don't seem to provide enough hazardous foolhardy adventures.  This year was no exception.

Our pilgrimage to the exact spot where we've always found our tree was a little challenging this year due to one very gigantic snow barrier...

Which was accompanied by one very ominous sign:

Before I go any further, I would like to point out a few important differences between boys and girls:
first, Girls can read complex sentences that contain nouns, adjectives, verbs, and most importantly, ill foreboding.  Also, a girl finds it very easy to extrapolate content and come to a sound conclusion based on her reading and thus would have easily and clearly deduced that the road was...well,  closed!  A girl wouldn't even need to be given a valid reason for the closure, she would just turn back and head farther up the road, no questions asked.

Boys on the other hand like to know why? and how come?  And while it is true that most boys can read, they usually prefer reading only small words and very short sentences.

This is why most truck makers use tiny words on products that they want to sell to boys.  For example:

See what I mean? Two numbers, a verb, and a noun.  Oh and an X, boys love x's.

Another highly unpublished truth is that when boys are in the woods, they suddenly become very bad at math.  On this occasion the boys deduced that:

one giant snow barrier + one 4x4 off road truck = the sign was clearly not meant for them.

And I'm sure you can guess what happened next.  Yep, first they decided to four-wheel AROUND the barrier:

My brother handed the boys shovels and the teenagers all attacked the snow at the side of the road.  After lots and lots of digging the truck made it far enough in when they suddenly realized that the side of the road is where the DITCH is located.

This is when they thought maybe they should try just going strait through.

Here's how that plan worked out:  

Did you notice the stellar traction of the 4x4 off-road's front passenger tire?  And while this sort of thing might seem concerning to a female, the boys here are are in total bliss.

Another fact about testosterone, one that boys think is a big secret among men, is that they love getting stuck in the woods. They just don't think we girls know that.  Apparently some freakish wilderness bonding takes place during the process of freeing yourself from Mother Nature's daunting grip.

Not to mention the joy and pleasure men derive from watching their wives give em' a push:

My brother enjoyed the pinnacle of precarious predicaments by having an all out stellar day entertaining himself with the hallmarks of "Unstuck-ing". Not only did he get his wife to push his truck, he got to watch his brother-in-law  (Mark) dig his tires free of the snow.

 ...the teenage boys do more shoveling and hand digging...

All while watching from the comfort of his heated 4x4 Off Road truck.

Meanwhile the little girls, realizing this was as far as their fathers would manage to get them into the woods, used the roadside ditch to entertain themselves:

Sledding into a thicket of trees, that's what memories are made of.

Once the boys had gotten the snow out of their system AND tires, and the girls had sledded to their hearts content, we headed farther up the road--as the sign predicted we would--and got back to the job at hand, finding the Christmas tree.

And while the boys think we think the occasion is all about getting a tree, we girls know it's all just a ruse for the husbands and sons to go play in the woods and force their wives and children to don garish snow apparel.