But it seems that life over 40 is soon going to force me into going steady. I keep finding gray hairs and I worry that this sort of demonized lamentation will eventually force me to succumb to a rolling appointment schedule with a hair-colorist. I break out in a sweat just thinking about having to schedule time to do this every six weeks. With the SAME person no less, because she's the only one who knows how to "mix my color just right" or so I'm told. But what's a graying girl to do?
Most gals love having their hair done but I've always been one of those awkward no-fuss sorta gals. I like to wear make-up and look nice to some degree but I just don't like gossiping with a gaggle of girls in a salon permeated with stink while I forge my meager attempts to get pretty. But the gray is coming in and I fear a crisis is unavoidable, my care-free non-committal days are numbered.
Unless I just go gray.
Seriously, it's been done. But really? Has it come down to that? Personalities like Stacy London embraced the gray with that bizarre streak in the front of her head but I think she looks like Johnny Depp in Sweeney Todd--and she's MY age for pete's sake. Doesn't Stacy know that those misplaced gray patches bring to mind folks like Bill Clinton's mother NOT forty-somethings--and most especially NOT for forty-somethings named Stacy.
But Lady Gaga even went gray and so did Kelly Osbourne, some sort of weird trend that seriously just made them look drab and old. Even Pink did it. But in my opinion they crossed the line into decrepit agedness waaaaaay waaaaaay too early.
But with all this gray-gone-wrong...Maybe it's time to c...c...c...I can hardly say it...(gulp) ...commit.
But then my mind starts to invent all kinds of random scenarios on why seeing a hairdresser on a regular basis could be bad. Like the whole prison issue, for one. What if I start coloring my hair and then end up in jail? Seriously, this sort of possibility is no laughing matter. I've seen women on TV doing interviews from jail with 3 inches of ghastly grow-out upstaging their prison-televised diatribes. And while I certainly have no plans to break the law and end up with a parole officer, these sort of problematic possibilities creep into my graying head. WHAT IF? Because once you start coloring your graying head of hair you are in for life. There is no parole there, jail or no jail. You've got to maintain it FOREVER.
Or what if you color your hair for so long that when your eyes go bad you don't even know you've turned yourself into a certified real life blue-hair? This is all seriously dangerous territory.
So here I sit, totally indecisive, on the border between my carefree days of non-committal youth and a wretched future of appointments with a slew of folks I pay to help me curb the rapid decay of old age that is suddenly creeping up, growing out, or sagging.
There are lots of decisions to make. Grow old GRAYsfully or fight it all the way? And of course, I just can't seem to commit to either plan.
You are a very committed friend & I like that about you.
ReplyDeleteMy hair gets grayer and grayer everyday but I can't commit to the every six weeks thing either. Too much $$$ plus, they never do Red right.
Oh Stacy, we could have been sisters, we're so dang similar. I keep thinking that, now I'm in my late 30's, I should have found a hairdresser to sort out a grown up style for me but I hate the thought of being stuck like I am with my dentist (who's bad but really nice). But I can't get away with lazy, messy teenage hair anymore. I have to do something. But maybe later.
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